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Monday, September 11, 2006
Change
Change is not constant. This is what i learn in my science classes. This means, everything is changing whether we like it a not. No one or Nothing can ever stop changing.
It takes only 3 months ever since we realise he suffer from cancer till it takes his life. 3 months, what could he be thinking in these 3 months knowing his life is going to end soon? Keep hoping for miracle to happen? hoping a change will just changes the whole situation?I began to adapt to the fact he suffered from cancer within a month.. however i need to adapt to another set of changes after that... thats when he left me....
I'm still learning to live without him by my side... without his guide, his teaching and his smile. I remember he said, life is short but you still have a long journey to go... walk along with a smile. Due to the the lost, i forget to smile, i live with the life of anger and hates. My temper was from bad to worst. i know I hurt a lot of peopler especially my best friend and the one I loved.
Not long later, another change step in, I was no longer the one with bad temper. I began to feel insecure. People that i used to hurt now began to be impatient with me. In short, i had learn to be patient but things had change. Guess it's too late.
Now, when things are balanced out. When I was about to be able to adapt the impatient of my loved once. Another change in my life just happen. I just felt so tired. I have lose all my will and hope throughout all this changed. I do not know what else will happen in future. I don't even dare to think of it now. After yesterday, i finally understand what he means.
"Life is just like a play. Everyone is given a role to play. When the role is ended, just leave with a smile. There is nothing to be sad about."
Guess my role is going to end soon....
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