A victim from domestic violence by so called 'sayang'...
A survivor from a suicidal attempt...
A witness in a 2 times life taking tragic-accident...
A failure whom fail every exam during A level...
A victim of losing 4 cellphones in 5 months...
A third party whom never known to all...
A girl that was being called 'psycho'...
And more...
I used to ask WHY... Why me? Why is it me who have to go through all these unlucky events. It's not easy to go through it and pretend everything is OK.
At night, I cry and cry.... Wondering if anyone will look down on me. I'm just paranoid.. living in fear...
I'm just a human. A human who wants to have a normal life just like the rest.
At times, I asked myself if there is any reason for God to plan it this way.
At times, I hated God for making me go through all this.
Of course I do know that things happen for reason...
Now,
I finally reallise the meaning of all these past...As I look back, I smiled.. I felt grateful for having the chance to experience what most people can't. To me, it's a give from God.
It's ExPerIENCE... Of course it may not be a happy thing to go through. However, going through it is a part of learning.
No longer blaming God or asking why it happens.... I'm just glad it had happened and it has past...
At least I know how it felt, how was it like... in short, I experience it and I know what to do if i faced it again. I guess not much people can ever know how is it feels like to be...(haha.. and proudly to tell my grandchildren next time of things I had experienced)
Yes, everything happened for a reason... I guess I found the reason... Thanks for the support...
I guess the next I need to face will be the critics on being CRAZY to not love my own life ;) Of ourse the reaction people will give after being a suicidal victims.